Intimacy Creates Fear

The underlying reason for all arguments in a relationship is fear. Generally fear of losing your partner.  When you have experienced the pleasure of giving to another emotionally,  you dread the pain of the retraction,

The stronger the connection, the greater the fear of disconnect, even if you "hate" the partner. Remember,hate is a very strong emotional bond.

Even when you have separated physically, you can still be very connected emotionally. Some couples who have been divorced for years will still fight with intense emotion, retaining the bond because the pain of disconnect is too great.

Physical connection
Emotional connection
Intellectual connection
(Spiritual connection)